Why I always remember October 31st but don't look forward to it...

At the age of 61, my mother died of cancer on October 31st 1985.  Ever since, I find this time of the year difficult, and struggle to "celebrate" Halloween. I enjoy seeing children dress up in costumes and getting excited about play acting their favorite characters, but cringe at horror and slasher films and all the focus on death. I don't enjoy seeing tombstones on lawns or people in zombie costumes. It just doesn't seem right to take death so lightly. I don't get it.

Must be my Catholic schooling.  October 31st, Halloween, is All-Hallows'-Eve which is the night-before-All-Saints'- Day.  While growing up, our school celebrated All-Saints Day, a holy day of obligation and All-Souls Day which is November 2nd. I was taught that all of the people who had died the past year, and were worthy to pass into heaven, did so on November 2nd. While I do recall wearing costumes and trick or treating on October 31st, the more important days are November 1st and November 2nd.  

I don't remember much about my mother's funeral in early November of 1985, but I do recall a conversation I had with one of my mom's friends from church - a nun.  She said "Isn't it nice that your mom died in time for All Saints' & All Souls Day...she's in heaven now".  Thank you sister...at the time that helped, and continues to take the sting away from October 31st.